Hudson Crew Burch

This pregnancy I have hoped for two things.  First to maybe get my first full term baby and second to possibly have a seven pounder which would also be a first for me.  I have been so anxious to get this guy here and so excited to get to see him.  Deke really wanted him to make it to November.  The craziness actually started on Friday November 2nd.  Emma and I had gone over to Chick-Fil-A for lunch and to play on the playplace.  I had been having contractions off and on for a couple of weeks and was already dilated to a two.  They would just start to get into a good pattern and then they would start to spread out and eventually stop all together.  A few days earlier Dr. Austin had told me she thought I would definitely make it to full term with this baby.  We had eaten lunch and Emma was playing on the equipment and I was talking to my mother in law.  Deke called in and I decided to call him back in a minute.  Two seconds later a text came to my phone saying call me now.  I got off the phone and called him only to find out that he had been in an accident with the truck.  Thank goodness he was fine and so was the other person but the truck we had both thought would live forever had finally met its match and it was totaled.  A story I will post about in more detail later.  So later that night after crashing the truck Deke had a big test to do online.  As he did his test and I managed the kids the contractions started coming on hard and closer together.  I tried to tell myself not to get excited.  Deke found a contraction timer app on my phone which was really fun.  So I started timing my contractions.  All night long Friday night through the night I contracted and hardly slept.  By about six o clock they were into a good pattern about six to seven minutes apart.  It was time to go in.  We woke up the kids excitedly and all three of them were giggling and grinning and talking with excitement about the baby coming as we all rushed around the house getting last minute things pulled together.  I hopped in a quick shower realizing that this may really be it.  I couldn't stop smiling I was so excited, there is maybe only one thing equally exciting to the day you have your babies.    For me the excitement of the day of each of their births have been the most amazing days of my life hands down.  It was so fun to be going down my list of stuff to not forget and then stopping to breathe through a contraction as Ave quizzed me about what was going to happen and Hunter (of course always very tuned in and concerned about my well being) checked on me every five minutes asking if I was okay.  He is so attentive to me just like a mini Deke.  Emma just meandered around the house smiling when we would say it was time for the baby to come out.  We loaded up and made the uncomfortable for me, hour drive across the valley and passed the kids off to Gma and Gpa Burch and headed to check in.  I couldn't believe how excited and giddy Deke and I were.  They got me all hooked up to the monitors and the nurse checked me.  "Let's see how dilated you are" she said and then he eyes got a look of surprise as she said "oh, well there's his head." Yeah.  I know lady believe me I can feel it.  I thought to myself as I laughed thinking I had been telling Deke he felt so low to me all morning long.  My doctor go figure was not on call until Monday but I knew the on call doctor well.  Dr. Folkstead had been Dr. McKernan's partner since before I had had Hunter.  Baby was tolerating the contractions well and so they gave me some Terbutaline to stop the contractions.  Dr. Folkstead decided that we would try to hold out until Monday and wait for Dr. Austin and give this little guy as much time in there as we could.  They would check me into a room and I would stay and wait which was fine with me except I would not be allowed to eat since there was at anytime a possibility that we may need to take me in to surgery.  As they got me all situated into a room Deke and I talked and watched shows and read books and pretty much just hung out all day Saturday.  They had done an ultrasound and guesstimated that he would be about seven pounds!!! I tried not to get to excited realizing this was an estimate and could still vary a couple ounces either way.    

Everytime I would need to get up to go to the bathroom I could barely walk because it felt like he was going to fall out.  The contractions would stay at bay for about an hour or so and then they would come on again strong.  "Deke I just feel like my body is telling me it is time for him to come out" I kept telling him.  I am such a strong believer in your body knowing exactly when it is time and trusting in it.  As they continued to try to keep the contractions at bay they continued to break through the medicine and a little before six o clock the plans had changed.  My nurse came in and told us that Dr. Folkstead felt like my body was saying it was ready and that the baby was ready to come out.  He reminded us that even though that very day we were exactly 37 weeks which is considered full term, it was still three weeks early and his lungs could still have issues.  Deke and I knowing that it was time for him to be born sat together in the room and held hands as we prayed for our sons body and lungs to be as developed as possible.  Prayed if it be His will that we would be able to hold and kiss on this little boy right away and not have to watch him on machines and in the NICU as we had had to endure three times before.  They brought Deke in some scrubs as I hurriedly called all my sisters and all the gmas and gpas to let them know the plan.                                        

It was amazing because within about fifteen minutes of making the decision we were prepped and ready to go in for the c-section.  As they made Deke wait outside in the hall and got me all ready and gave me my spinal I sat there and looked around my anxiety building.  One minute my mind flashed back to moments from the twins birth and I could feel fears arising in me and nerves.  As I pushed them away I tried to remember Emma's birth so calm and wonderful.  I couldn't help it things have been changed forever for me.  It will never be the same now that I have experienced what I have and there are still moments where the trauma of our past loss seeps in and I have to fight hard.  As Deke came in the room and kissed me and Dr. Folkstead began to ask me questions about him I felt myself calm down.  I thought to myself that there was a chance that this might be my last time doing this and reminded myself to focus on taking it all in.  Suddenly all I saw was the smiling nurses taking guesses at how big he was going to be.  The calm, cool quiet in the room with the music playing softly.  Looking over at the little hospital crib waiting with blankets and all the tools to care for our new little one.  I saw Deke grinning ear to ear with tears starting to fall holding my hand and felt appreciation and overwhelming love for him and every journey that we had gone through so far to get our children here.  I felt the baby squirm in my belly and tears started to fall as I prepared to meet him and yet also felt the loss of him being part of me having such awe at what a miracle it is to create life and have a child grow within you.  I was ready, and it was time.

Before we knew it Dr. Folkstead was telling Deke to hold the camera up and take some pictures of him being born.  Deke who couldn't watch held the camera over the sheet and got some really neat photos of him being born.  Within minutes a deep cry filled the room, sounding healthy and strong.  Most wonderful, relieving sound to any mom who has carried with care and worried for nine months about this growing baby.  He was here!!!!

As I laid there I just listened to the happy talking and laughing of Deke and the nurses and the beautiful cries of our baby.  Deke walked over and as soon as I saw the first hints of that little pink and blue striped beanie I thought my heart would burst.  He was gorgeous and chubby, rosy pink and healthy.  He had the tiniest little nose and our baby burch bulldog cheeks.  He looked bigger to me instantly and I wondered how much he would weigh.

As they brought him close and I kissed him, I said "Hi Hudson"and just like Hunter right after he had been born he opened his eyes and we saw each other for the first time.  It was amazing.  I couldn't believe how his name instantly felt so right to me.  It felt so natural, he was Hudson and it felt like he had always been here.  All those months of worry and prayers and longing and hoping he had made it safe and sound.  He was okay and we were going to get to have him here on this earth to love and hold and watch grow.  My heart was overflowing.  Thank you Heavenly Father, I have been blessed a hundred fold.  Deke and I have been through things that have taken us down to our very foundation.  However we have been blessed with so  much joy in our lives I can't even comprehend.  They whisked him away to the nursery to weigh and check him.  Deke kissed me and headed off with him as Dr. Folkstead told me how good everything looked and how well my body had healed from Emma's delivery.

A phone call came to the operating room and a nurse shared the news that baby boy burch was 7lbs and 4oz and 19 1/2 inches long!!!!!  We got a seven pounder!!!!! To top it all off he had been born at exactly 37 weeks and so they happily announced we were also getting our first full term baby!!!!! Apgar scores were great and his little lungs were more than fine :) :) Hudson Crew Burch was born at 7:01 pm on Sat. Nov. 3.

Right away there was something about him that surprisingly reminded me not of Hunter but of Emma.  I still two weeks later am not totally sure what it is but there is something.  He had not a ton of hair but just enough and in the back where it was the thickest it was nice and dark.  The thing I couldn't get over was his tiny little nose, it was so much smaller than the other kids.  As they did all there measuring everyone watched from the windows of the nursery and three excited older sibling ooooed and awwwed at him.

Avery smiled' and wanted to talk all about everything they were doing to him.  When they pointed to him and said "Emma there is baby Hudson" she looked in at him, smiled then as if it was so normal she waved "Hi Hudson" she said smiling totally calm as if he had always been there.  It was so precious.

I wish I could have seen the first moment that Hunter saw him but Deke said that he will never forget it.  Hunter has always been a sensitive kid.  As he saw Hudson for the first time he started to cry and said "I have waited nine years for this brother!"  Which made everyone smile and laugh since he is only nine years old to begin with :) :) :) :) That kid.  He could not stop grinning that he had a brother.  It is weird for me to look at this picture of Hunter looking in on Hudson thinking how vivid it is in my mind that I was just staring down at him in the nursery.  Where does time go?

Right off the bat Hudson was our most alert and attentive baby.  Eyes wide open looking around taking everything in.  Another thing I thought was so sweet is that this kid knew his daddy's voice.  Everytime Deke would talk to him his eyes would get wide and search around to find Deke.  Then he would just stare at Deke intently listening to everything he was saying and take it all in.  He knows his daddy.

They got me all situated in the room and around ten o clock that night in pjs the kids were able to come and see him and hold him.  It was the sweetest moment for Deke and I to watch them scan him over and investigate every minute detail of him.  They were in love and so were we.  Again it hit me how weird it was that it seemed so normal to have four and didn't really feel like an adjustment.  It just felt so right.

Grandma and grandpa Burch and McWhorter got to take a turn holding him.....

Hudson makes #20 for the Burch grandkids and I loved that Dave quickly made this little makeshift sign to celebrate that moment.  It was really sweet.

I love this picture of Dave and Nalene holding him...

My boys....two of the four of them :) :)

Our family.  Looking at this picture hit me in so many different ways.  First how wonderful it is to see four little faces all around us and how good it feels to now be a family of six.  Second how all of a sudden our family feels so much bigger for some reason.  Last for some reason it hit me that there are of course two other spots in our family that are missing right now but that with Ethan and Dylan, Deke and I have just been blessed with our sixth child.  We have four boys and two girls.  I love my life.  I am so grateful at the opportunity to be given these sweet, amazing people to help take care of and raise and love everyday.  Hudson's birth was incredible and wonderful.  Deke and I spent the rest of the evening holding, kissing, smelling and snuggling him.  None of my kids have ever felt so natural to me as he has right off the bat.  We love you Hudson, welcome home :) :) Mommy and Daddy :)